Following the bombing, McKinstry was “consumed” with sadness. She was depressed and hopeless, but she failed to connect her feelings with the bombing and the loss of her friends. She had no understanding of grief or trauma and had no access to resources that might have helped her unpack her experience. Instead, she tried to block out her emotions and return to a normal life.

Membership at the church declined sharply, and Birmingham was plagued by “tension and fear.” The girls’ deaths sent the message that “Black life was cheap” (161), and more dangerous shrapnel bombs began exploding in Birmingham’s Black neighborhoods. These bombs were meant to kill, not merely intimidate, and McKinstry felt that her community was powerless in the face of this hatred and violence. She developed “a preoccupation with death and dying” and spent much of her time alone, rocking with her arms wrapped around herself, “trying to make the deep pain go away” (162).

McKinstry still had faith in Dr. King and President Kennedy. However, she encountered “yet another heavy, heartbreaking tragedy” (166) when President Kennedy was assassinated on November 22, 1963. She was “deeply saddened” by the news but not particularly surprised; supporting the civil rights movement was like “sign[ing] his death warrant” (165).