The Nonexistent Knight is set in a world of mediocrity, the narrator explains, where few people are motivated to achieve anything. In such a world, lingering elements of diluted will and unclaimed existence have gathered together and merged with the empty suit of armor. The result is Agilulf. The narrator introduces herself as Sister Theodora, a nun who belongs to the Order of Saint Columbia. She is writing out this story as her own personal penance. Since she has never experienced a war firsthand, she does not believe that she will be able to give an account of the battle. When she begins to describe several examples of war, however, she seems more than familiar with the subject.

Raimbaut waits for the signal which will begin the battle. His lust for vengeance has been dulled by the reality of war, which is less glorious than he imagined. Theodora describes the battle as a chaotic maelstrom of violence and coughing. Eventually, the opposing armies are rendered immobile by the piles of bodies and clouds of dust. Rather than blows, they can only exchange insults. Since they cannot understand each other’s insults, they call on translators to convey the meaning to their rivals.