As an assignment from his therapist, Evan writes letters to himself to better express his true feelings. These letters represent his struggle to be his authentic self. He is in constant battle between expressing his true, dark feelings and hiding behind the confident, optimistic attitude he believes his therapist and mom want to see. That internal struggle manifests in the real world when Connor steals one of the letters, which is then mistaken as a suicide note, catalyzing the novel’s main plot. As the lie surrounding this letter grows more complicated, Evan in turns feels more guilty and confused. It’s only after the letter’s origin is exposed that Evan finds internal balance and learns to integrate both his strengths and weaknesses into his true, authentic self.

The summer before his senior year of high school, Evan breaks his arm when he falls out of a tree while working as an apprentice park ranger. His mom encourages him to reach out to his classmates by having them sign his cast. The only person who signs Evan’s cast is Connor, when they meet in the computer lab.

After the cast is removed, Evan often catches himself reaching for his arm, remembering when he fell out of the tree.