The narrator explains the history of the American monarchy by telling how General George Washington was asked to become the first King of America and graciously accepted the role. Although the narrator muses that things might have turned out differently if George Washington had insisted on becoming an elected official, the narrator believes that the audience isn’t interested in “a made-up story” (1). Instead, the narrator promises a salacious tale about the descendants of King George I, “the most famous family in the world” who still sit on the American throne to this day and are embroiled in “secrets and scandals” (2).

Princess Beatrice Washington, the future Queen of America, meets with her parents, the King and Queen of America, after the last Cabinet meeting of the year. Beatrice is stunned when her parents ask about her personal life and whether she is currently dating anyone. As the Queen’s Ball approaches, the king and queen have decided that Beatrice should start searching for a husband, and they hope to use the Ball as a way for Beatrice to mingle with the eligible men who meet their criteria. Beatrice knows that as the future queen, she can “only marry someone of noble or aristocratic blood” (7), but she is still surprised at how short the list of eligible men is.